Memories Keeping Me Here
by Hori Midorikawa
Summary: After Maria's death, James confesses reluctantly that he knew everything, but will he still recieve the 'punishment' he deserves? PH X James R&R Please
1. The Incident

"James honey? Did something happen to you? After we got separated in that long hallway?"

The words crept slowly through my mind, I remembered it – she died, she was stabbed through the middle for god's sake!

But my mind was plagued more with the thoughts of what DID happen to me after we got 'separated'…

…

James sat on the cold elevator floor, tears made their way slowly down his bruised face, he'd just seen Maria die…

_He felt too shaken to leave the elevator right then, maybe he should rest, after all, these…things shouldn't be able to open those doors right?_

_A small amount of time passed and he was startled when he saw the floor tear open next to him, the edge of the Great Knife sticking through the metal. He stood up quickly, tearing at the doors, pulling them open; Pyramid Head was going to kill him too. Or – a shiver ran down his spine – rape him like those monsters he'd seen. This made him more frantic and desperate as the screeching was slowly coming to a halt and he knew he was nearly out of time for his escape._

'_No, No No NO NO NO NO NO NO!' His mind screamed in terror – It was not going to happen to him! _

_He finally opened the doors as he caught sight of Pyramid Head climbing up the hole he'd made – and maybe it wasn't his last!_

_The corridor was about medium length, and he ran full out, not caring about anything anymore, until he hit against the rusted bloody wall, the feeling was thick and slippery. Disgusting…_

_It was also a dead end. James turned round to see Pyramid Head at the elevator entrance, not much more than 7 feet away. Seeing there was nothing left for him, he held both of his arms up in surrender._

"_I don't care anymore, it's not like I forgot what I did… I need someone to punish me for what I did! And I realize it's you who has to do it… So I don't care what you do to me, just make all this end!"_

_He'd only really PRETENDED he's forgotten about killing Mary – it was the only thing that kept him sane. It was a rash movement, he'd just picked up the pillow and held it down hard on her face, he'd cried then, saying as he suffocated her 'I love you'._

"_IF IT MAKES ALL THIS GUILT AND SORROW GO AWAY – I'LL SUBMIT TO ANYTHING!"_

_Pyramid Head looked at James from underneath his heavy sharp helmet, tilting it up so his face was revealed, but hidden by the darkness of the Otherworld and shade of the Pyramid Helmet he always wore, but even though it was barely noticeable in the dusk, James could almost see forgiveness…or sadness… grace the monster's grey face._

_James squeezed his eyes shut tight as he awaited the monster's forceful actions, but nothing came… Well, nothing painful just then. A long black tongue came from under the Pyramid and licked gently at James' face, surprising the 29 year old._

_He thought back to Mary as Pyramid Head continued his action, remembering how happy she used to be, how much she loved this town, and how much she wanted to return, but the office was getting too busy, he couldn't get even a weekend off to be with his terminally ill wife, he never fulfilled his promise to go back with her._

"_I'm sorry…."_

_The monster stopped licking him abruptly. James looked up; his dirty blonde hair flopped in front of his eyes._

"_I'm sorry I never brought her back…"_

_Pyramid Head retracted his tongue slowly, as if he could understand what the man was saying._

"_W-why did this town only turn to hell after she left it?" He quizzed._

_Pyramid Head emitted a strange growl, his tone nearly the exact same as James when he was in pain._

_Of course, monsters can't speak._

_James almost found it bizarre he wasn't being roughed up against the gory reddened wall. He expected Pyramid Head to be forcing him bent over, like how it happened to unlucky guys in prison. _

_But this was way worse than prison._

_He closed his eyes, and regretted it, for the monster's rapist nature flooded back into him as James felt him being dragged off by the jacket. He struggled and yelled, but it was useless, he'd only attract more monsters, and he'd be raped and then killed._

_But, wouldn't Pyramid Head kill him once he was done anyway?_

_He next felt himself in a room, a dirty, cloggy-aired room. The walls were just rusty, no gory blood and guts here, but there was a hospital bed._

_He was correct on the monsters intent._

_He closed his eyes in a foul disgust as the monster ripped his clothing from him, and rubbed his grimy gloved hands onto James' intimate areas, the man was flushed and ashamed._

_James' noticed Pyramid Head's gloves – the fingers were stuck together for some reason. He had a small notion that they must have been uncomfortable or even painful._

_He felt sorry for the monster, having to live the purgatory of hurting people because of things they'd done. He realised in that small moment that he too was a monster. He'd murdered his own wife, the woman he loved and was meant to protect._

_He had no right._

_No excuse._

_He felt anger and sadness battle each other as he was thrown roughly onto the grubby bed sheets, both wanting dominance over him._

_The monster removed his bloody apron, and tossed it to the dusty floor. James recoiled in horror in what he could only make out as something that would rip his ass in half._

"_N-no!" He choked out weakly, despite saying he'd take anything as his punishment._

_Then the one thing he thought would never happen happened. Pyramid Head's hands went up to said Pyramid, and removed it._

_James' eyes widened at what he saw as the creatures real face._

_Pyramid Head's face was just like a normal human. His hair way a dusky black, but his eyes were nearly GLOWING red, putting more truth into calling him the red devil, even the white's were a darkish red themselves._

_James couldn't really take this in, not really. He felt he'd pole-jumped the Looney queue here. Seriously, raped by a monster? C'mon, that doesn't happen in real life, right?_

_Right?_

_It does._

_His reasoning cancelled all of the other possible objectives, leaving him with the truth._

_He was in a layer of reality, just a simple layer. Called Hell._

_He let out a pained scream as he felt the monster thrust into him, no preparation, no warning, nothing._

_He hadn't felt this much physical pain for a very long time, not since he'd once crashed his car. Mary sat by his bedside for months until he was fully recovered, then he proposed to her. It was such a wonderful day, getting his whole life back._

_As he felt the abuse continue, he threw out all pained noises and sobs mixed with Mary's name from his throat, finally letting go of everything he bottled up._

_He was receiving his punishment._

_He choked out a sob, a loud one as the monster sped up, he didn't want to feel this, he wanted to rewind so he could stop himself from killing her. He wanted it all to stop!_

_Not much more of the act and the monster released him, pulling out._

_James felt broken in various ways; he threw himself at the monster, slamming his fists against his solid, grubby chest._

"_WHY?!" He screamed in sadness. "WHY DID YOU HAVE TO DO THIS TO ME!? WHY?!"_

_His fists were only being tapped against Pyramid Head, in a form of pathetic violence._

_The monster looked down at the crying man, he felt a slight pang in what should be his heart – which he thought was non-existent._

_He turned round, putting his apron and helmet back on, and leaving the naked man in the room all alone._

"_I know why…" He said to himself upon watching the monster leave._

…_._

"Are you confusing me with someone else?"

Maria's voice brought me back from my memory, pulling me into the layer of reality we were in.

"No, I'm not…" I said, slightly hoarse.

…


	2. The Conclusion

"I-I was weak, and that's why I needed you… I needed someone to punish me for my sins. But that's all over, and now it's time to end this."

James rose to his feet to stare at the Pyramid Heads- wait, where had the other one gone? Either way, he decided it was time to end the confusion his heart had felt from what happened after Maria had been killed for the very first time…

He shook as his gaze met with the rusted bloodied helmet. The Pyramid Head, the very same one who'd followed him from the apartments….No; it was James who followed the monster. The monster lifted its large spear, blood still warm and running down the long weapon, and walked after James.

'No, how can this-' James thought, he'd only wanted to tell the monster…

He ducked as the spear lunged at him.

'I only wanted to say…'

He ran and tripped over the tatted rug, quickly recomposing himself as the spear grazed his back.

'That even if you are a monster…'

He was just under the monster, and ducked under his legs to escape the weapon again.

'If you are just an illusion…'

He saw the being over him, no escape this time, he looked into the helmet, but it's shadows hid the face he so longed to see.

'I'll stay here, with you.'

Then, before his eyes, the spear was directed away from James, and into the helmet with a powerful force.

"N-NO!" He yelled out in one choked cry.

The blood spattered his face and hair and jacket and the lifeless body above him fell to the ground with a long echoing thud.

He took one paled hand – made paler by Silent Hill's already abnormal foggy atmosphere- and removed the helmet. Then he fell onto the monster's chest and cried loudly.

"I have to go… I have to find Mary. But… I'll come back…"

And with that the blonde left…

…-===-…

PYRAMID HEAD'S SIDE

"I-I was weak, and that's why I needed you… I needed someone to punish me for my sins. But that's all over, and now it's time to end this."

The monster flinched at the statement. Did this truly mean James no longer wanted him around? He noticed his only comrade had vanished, to and why, he didn't know, but he felt anger rise, he wasn't letting James give him up so easily!

He saw the blonde human shake and eyes widen as he lifted his spear and pointed it at him.

'This is where we are going to end this.'

He thrusted his spear in a variety of ways, James missing due to his catlike dodges.

'All this uncertainty, I'm going to make it stop'

He saw James trip on the rug and sprinted, but clumsily missed again.

'Because, even if I don't exist.'

James ran under his legs and he flushed under his Pyramid shaped prison.

'If I'm just some sort of illusion to you.'

He looked down at the blonde, sprawled on his back, the spear mere centimetres away from his face.

'Then I guess…There's no point trying anymore.'

He shoved his spear into the flesh of his jaw and collapsed, dying.

The last thing he heard was one long cry from the only person who mattered to him.


End file.
